An Adventure in Faith

I am not the kind of person that you might describe as adventurous.  I like the "normal", the routine and often times mundane.

I would rather stay in than go out, I get to know a certain group of friends, co-workers etc and I don't feel the need to really expand my horizons. Because putting myself out there for someone or something new is scary. And I don't do scary.

I like the comfortable.

Perhaps this is why God is stretching me a bit. Because even in my faith I have become comfortable.  I believe in God - I will pray for people and tell them that He is in control, I will share how He has worked in my life...but do I really believe it for my life?

When everything feels like it is out of control - do I believe He has a plan?

People who know us, our close family and friends who have walked through the past 15 years of our marriage, know that life has never been "easy" for Dominic and I.

We have walked through some very dark and difficult times, we have fought - with God's help - for restoration and renewal - and we have seen the fruits of that labor. But it has never been easy. It seems that we are often taking a step forward and then two steps back. Whether it is job related, or cars that break down, finances...you name it, it seems a struggle.

When our family starts saying "When will you ever catch a break"...we know it isn't just us and our perspective...but others can see it too.

And yet Lord I still believe in something better....

Dominic and I were talking the other night about all of this and he said that maybe, for us, it just won't ever be "easy street". Maybe we need the struggle so that we can step outside of ourselves, seek God's help and direction and then someday be there for someone else going through the very same thing.

And yet, if I am honest, my heart cries for our silver lining...our break...our dream.

But would that really make me happy?

Last week I blogged about Joy.  I had no idea when I wrote that post that a few hours later I would be getting my walking papers from my 13 yr job.  But as I read the post again I still feel what I wrote. I can still find the joy in the midst of the uncertainty that is my day today.

God has called me to an adventure in faith with Him.

A journey that is uncertain and sometimes scary. A journey that requires me to step out of my comfortable and trust in Him completly. And right now I have to do this....I can't imagine any other way to deal with everything....but to have faith that this too shall be ok.

I am memorizing Proverbs 3:5-6 right now and it is so appropriate for this time in my life.

"Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; and in all things acknowledge Him and He will make your paths straight."

As I adventure out in faith I trust in my God with ALL my heart - not just the comfortable part...but the uncomfortable too. I stop trying to figure out the "whys" with my small amount of understanding and I will bring ALL things to God, acknowledging that He knows better than I and give Him the control back to place me on the best path for my life.

Lord I admit that I wasn't ready for this adventure with You...but now that I am "in" I am all Yours!

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Joy

I am linking up today with Bonnie over at Faith Jam to talk about Joy.

When I looked up the definition of Joy I was surprised to see what the first description was.

"The emotion evoked by well-being, success, or good fortune or by the prospect of possessing what one desires"

Interesting I think because I don't think that is how I would describe the things that bring me joy in this life.

If my joy was defined by my well-being, or success or good fortune - things defined of this world - I would probably find myself disappointed and unhappy.  Because we won't always have a perfect, successful, fortunate life.

There will be tough times and can I find joy in those times too?

I think that we have and we do.

Here are just a few of the things that bring me joy lately....

The toothy grin that Karlena gives me in the morning.

Hearing Elijah say his prayers.

Asking Gabriel to tell me about his day when I am picking him up from school.

Having conversations with Isaac and feeling blessed that he still talks to me! ;)

Phone calls with my husband when he is away for work and sharing our day with each other.

By the world's standards these may not be things that should bring me joy, but they do.

And I am grateful.

I have found that seeing joy is really about about my perspective. And when I choose to see the joy in the little things, I am blessed.

So how about you? Where do you find joy in your days? Please share - I would love to hear!



Purposeful

Purposeful:

having a purpose, meaningful, intentional, full of determination

I don't usually make New Year's resolutions.

When I was in Jr High I would make these silly resolutions like "I will have a boyfriend this year", or "I will be more popular"....

I will be honest - they never turned out as I hoped and I usually felt like I let myself down.

I don't like setting goals for myself that I know I won't really care about in a week or two. I don't buy into the "lose weight now with the newest exercise fad" and although I know it is good for me....setting a resolution to floss more will be left by the wayside in very quick order.

By February I have forgotten what it was that was so important to me on January 1st and I usually won't think about it until the end of the year and I realize that I once again I haven't met my resolution.

But this year I heard about "One Word 365".

The premise is simple. Decide on a word that you want to define your year.

This I think I can handle....and so for the past few days I have been thinking about what word best describes what I would like to see for myself in 2012.

And this is what I have come up with....

Purposeful.

I want to be more purposeful in my marriage. To really spend time strengthening the relationship I have with Dominic. He is my best friend and I often take him for granted. I want to be more purposeful about showing him respect and supporting him in all that he does.

I want to be more purposeful with my kids. So often in the business of the week I get caught up with what needs to be done and get frustrated when I don't feel the kids are cooperating. I want to make sure that they know how important they are, to encourage conversations and to just plain have fun with them.

I need to be more purposeful about my relationship with God. I don't want God to be a "phone a friend" when I need something kind of relationship. I need to be more purposeful about getting into His Word and asking for His guidance and direction in ALL things.

I also want to be more purposeful in my prayer life. I pray all the time, but I want to start praying specifically each day for people in my life. I believe that God answers prayers and so I am going to start keeping track of the prayer requests I receive and watching as God answers those prayers throughout the year.

And finally I want to be more purposeful about my time. Admitedlly I spend more time than I probably should on the computer. And while I love blogging, I have to make sure that it isn't cutting into time that should be spent on one of the things listed above.

So as I go through 2012 I hope to share with you where I am being more purposeful and hopefully how it is changing who I am.

How about you? What word would you chose to define your 2012??