The Many Faces of Elijah

Is Your Heart Ready?

This morning we got a call from my MIL Becky. Last night Dominic’s brother Aaron and his fiancé Kim and her son Cole were in driving to Sioux Falls and due to snow and ice on the roads and some drivers in front of them, were in an accident where they lost control of Aaron’s truck, went into the ditch, rolled and hit a tree.

Thankfully, and praise God for it, no one was seriously hurt.

But the call really made me stop and think this morning. We never know when our “time” will be. Many of us can think of a time that something happened that was a close call – where we “faced” death. 8 years ago I had a cyst burst inside of me and I bled internally for many hours before I went to the doctor. When I got to the hospital my blood pressure was dangerously low and I had to have emergency surgery where my doctor was able to save me. Had I gotten in the car and driven home that night…well I may not be here today. God had other plans for me.

But at the time, that situation didn’t really make me stop and take inventory about how I was living and where my heart was. This morning was different though. When I heard about the accident I could only think that I was grateful for the safety of my family, but also grateful that I know they have Christ as their Savior.

And I wonder how many of us are walking around trusting that we will have another day to make that decision. Another day to change our sinful behavior, another day to do it right…tomorrow. What if tomorrow doesn’t come?

I have shared before that I accepted Christ as my Savior when I was really young. But I didn’t really “get” it. I basically thought it was just asking Christ into my heart and everything would be roses. It wasn’t. I didn’t understand what I had done wrong and I kept asking Him back in over and over.

I spent many years, as a teenager and young adult seeking after my own selfish motives. I focused on the world and what it had to offer and less on what God would have me do. When Dominic and I got married I carried this behavior into our relationship and it was a recipe for disaster.

For 10 years we lived as husband and wife but not with God as the forefront of our marriage. The husband and wife titles were just that…titles. For many years we were more like roommates. Roommates that didn’t like each other. It was difficult, really difficult. And when things got bad I blamed God. Where was He? Why didn’t He change my husband? Why did we have to live like this?

Did I ever take a real serious look at myself? NO! Did I ever take responsibility for the things I was doing that contributed to our disharmony? NO! I was more comfortable with pointing my 1 finger at someone else and wouldn’t see the 3 pointing back at myself.

At one point we joined a church, even went as far as being baptized as adults. Professing our faith in God and asking for His forgiveness. I honestly believe that we wanted that for our lives, living a life with God at the center. But we didn’t know how to do it in all practical reality.

You see I had missed a key component in the “salvation” story. The part about repentance and what that really meant. A turning away from ones sin. Our pastor talks about running in the opposite direction of that sinful nature. I didn’t do that. I wanted to just accept Christ and have my life be better. I didn’t want to have to change myself in the process.

God was patient with me, He knew where I would end up and He let me make my choices so that I would learn from them. And eventually I did. I still am…

And so again I wonder, who out there is like me? Believing that they are “saved” but choosing to live in sin, refusing to repent…to run away from that sinful behavior? Blaming God because their lives aren’t changing.

The good news is that it isn’t too late. But you just can’t keep putting it off any longer!! We don’t know what tomorrow will hold and your soul is too important to put off making a choice for Christ!

If you are living a life that isn’t honoring to God, turn from that sin and run towards the only One who can save you. Is it easy to change patterns of behavior that seem so ingrained? No – I would be lying if I said it was.

I still see those old behaviors in my life today. But I see them less and less and I recognize them much sooner and make amends much faster than I had in the past. All of that is only possible because I have come to develop a personal relationship with God.

He isn’t this “supernatural” being up in the sky. He is a God that rides with me to work every day. That blesses me with peace and a confidence in Him. It just isn’t about what I have done or who I am….not at all!! My life is good today because of Him – in spite of me.

Is my life all roses? Nope. Honestly I wish it were easier sometimes. I feel frustrated when I can’t see His purpose in things. I feel disappointed when opportunities don’t open up for our family like I think they should and I often question what His will is in our lives.

The truth is I am not God! I know…big revelation. And I shouldn’t expect to know all that He knows. I want things in MY time and not His. I am human but it is my goal to be less and less of this world and more and more of Him. But I have to stay connected with Him.

About an hour ago I got a call with some disappointing news. Without getting into the specific details of that call, I will just share that it was something that we wanted for our family, something we prayed about asking for God’s will in the situation. Today we got our answer.

He closed the door. And in all honesty I am struggling with that. I don’t understand why the door had to be closed. I can’t see what He might have in store that is different and so I sit feeling frustrated. It is in my “old” nature to act on those feelings…lash out at God and be angry or depressed.

I knew coming in today that I wanted to write a post about what I was thinking about in the car. And when I got that call I wasn’t feeling like I really wanted to share the “Good News” of Christ because I wasn’t feeling it.

But you see that is the point. Even though I am not “feeling it” doesn’t mean that God isn’t still there in the middle working everything out for good. I just can’t quite see it yet. My vision is clouded – not His. And if I am going to honestly pray for His will in my life then I have to be open to the possibility of closed doors just as I would be to open ones.

I know this is long and hopefully it is making some bit of sense. Getting down to brass tacks people. If you don’t have Christ as your Savior – what is stopping you? Don’t wait any longer! If you are stuck in sinful behavior and can’t seem to get out - turn to Him, reach out for help and see your life dramatically change. If it is possible for me, it is possible for you too!

I have seen the benefits in my own life from trusting in God and I am more than willing to get into more detail if you have any questions. Please feel free to e-mail me anytime at kasmith03@gmail.com.

Blessings dear friends

Elijah at 6 months

At 6 months old I am growing and changing every day. I have now in the last week mastered the art of sitting up without falling over and am enjoying my new found sense of the things around me.

I like to reach for toys and I put everything in my mouth. I drool all the time but I don't have any teeth yet - mom is happy about that!

I love to make sounds and squeal and I laugh when my mom shakes her head at me. I love my brothers too and calm down and sleep when Isaac rocks me in the recliner.

I now weigh 22 lbs and am 27.5 in long! I still have no desire to roll over, but I blame that on my chubby tummy and thighs. It is just too hard to move all of that around!

I have started to eat "real" food and love green beans and peas. I will eat carrots and squash but I don't enjoy them quite as much as the green vegetables. I eat a lot at a time and sometimes help mom put the spoon in my mouth!

I still don't sleep through the night but know that mom secretly enjoys our time together so I will probably keep it up for awhile!

I keep hearing mom say that I am a blessing so I think I must be pretty special! I hope that you can come and visit me soon because next time you see me I will have changed again for sure!

Today is a special day!

Today is a very special day. 13 years ago today Isaac came into this world at 8lbs 15oz with big chubby cheeks and dark black hair. Today Isaac enters officially the world of a teenager now sporting blonde/brown hair, size 12 men’s feet and a 5’ 8” frame that now looks down on mom!
Isaac is a wonderful young man. He is caring and kind, helpful and understanding. He excels in school and is a talented musician. He is our firstborn and we have been blessed to spend the last 12 years being his parents.

We aren’t perfect parents and we often make mistakes and Isaac probably has had to bear the brunt of those mistakes more than the other boys. But he has been willing to forgive and to grow and change with us as a family. We are so proud of him and are looking forward to seeing where God will lead him!

In addition to Isaac’s birthday we are also celebrating Elijah’s 6 month birthday on the same day! Elijah has grown and changed so much in the past 6 months. We have his 6 month check up next Wednesday so I will post more about his “stats” then. Today I am marveling at how fast time goes.

For now, let me say again that we love you boys. We are blessed by each and every one of you!

50 Things

I have seen this done on other blogs and thought it might be fun. I wanted to share 50 things about myself that you may or may not know. Kind of a “get to know me” sort of deal. Sorry if this gets too lengthy!! And if you want to know more just leave me a comment and maybe I can add to the list!! Enjoy!

1) I am 34 years old – will be 35 in January.
2) My hair is permed, but after 3 kids I now also have some natural curl in there too.
3) I have always been jealous of people that have long, beautiful, straight hair. Mine has always been frizzy at the ends and doesn’t look nice straight.
4) I would love to get Lasik surgery done.
5) I am obsessed with my teeth, always worried there might be something in them so I am always checking them in a mirror.
6) The first thing I do when I get up in the morning is brush my teeth. And then before I leave for work I brush them again.
7) We have 2 cats and a dog. I thought that I was a “pet” person but I have come to realize that for me the idea of being a pet person is way better than the reality of being a pet person.
8) When our cats vomit on our carpet I secretly want to throw them outside and see if they “runaway”. But the thought usually makes me feel pretty guilty.
9) I love to read but I always seem to start a book and then have a hard time finishing it.
10) When I do find a rare moment to read I tend to read every 4th word. I am a skimmer and often find if I reread something that there is something that I have missed.
11) I LOVE doing craft projects. I have a craft closet in my house that is stuffed full of crafty things. Problem is I often start something and then don’t finish it.
12) One of my character defects is starting something and then not finishing it!
13) I would love to learn how to sew, quilt specifically. But I am afraid that I will learn, start something and then not finish it and I don’t have another closet to spare for storage.
14) When I was younger I wanted so badly to be a professional ice skater. My friend Renee was really good, got to take lessons etc. and I thought it was such a beautiful sport. But I wasn’t athletic or graceful enough for a sport like that!
15) I have always wanted to learn how to play the guitar. My brother Mark taught himself how to play and didn’t even know how to read music. I would love to be talented like that.
16) If I ever learned how to play the guitar I would want to learn “church camp” songs. When I went to camp I always thought it would be awesome to be that person up front leading the music.
17) I took piano lessons until I was 8 or 9. I begged my parents to quit. My piano teacher had lost her husband and she would tell me that he was on a long bus trip in the sky. It creeped me out and I didn’t want to be alone with her. Besides my love of “quitting” was already quite developed and practicing was just no fun.
18) I am now living out my desires to be a talented musician vicariously though my oldest son Isaac. His piano teacher says he has more talent in his little finger than most do in their whole body. I encourage him NOT to quit.
19) I am jealous of women that say they are planning when they will get pregnant next and then make it happen. Getting pregnant with Gabriel and Elijah wasn’t “easy” and I always thought it would have been nice to “plan” it.
20) I don’t think I am done having kids yet. Maybe it is lack of sleep, or hormones from nursing but I already want to be pregnant again. It isn’t a good time really financially but my heart’s desire is to have a daughter.
21) If we do ever get pregnant again and have a daughter I want to name her after my best friend Karlena. She is an amazing example of faith and it would be such an honor to raise a daughter teaching her about who her namesake is.
22) I am blessed with a good job. I like what I do and who I work with. But if we could afford it I would stay home. I get so much enjoyment out of helping at the school or having lunch with Gabriel or having nice meals ready for dinner and I wish that I could do those things every day.
23) I am jealous of moms that get to stay home and be available for their family in that way.
24) I am often envious of people that don’t live paycheck to paycheck. We are definitely responsible for any debt we have and are working to be debt free some day but it seems that often others have an easier time at it than we do.
25) Jealousy/Envy is another one of my character defects. I often pray that God will help me be content where I am, not seeking after where I think I should be.
26) My natural tendency is to point out the negative in situations. I am working hard to combat this and with God’s help I am seeing life in the positive now much more often.
27) I accepted Christ as my personal Savior when I was really young at a Christian Women’s Club brunch I went to with my mom.
28) I reaccepted Christ every time that we went to these meetings. At the time I was looking for some “big change” and when I still was my regular self I thought that I didn’t do it right so I kept trying over and over hoping that someday I would “get it”.
29) 3 years ago I began a journey of developing a real relationship with God – one in which I am seeking His will for my life and trying to walk with Him daily.
30) I say that I am seeking God’s will for my life but I secretly hope that path doesn’t take me somewhere uncomfortable.
31) I often stretch myself too thin. I don’t like to say no to people and I want to be involved and helpful, but it often leaves me feeling worn out. I need to get a better handle on my priorities.
32) I love to sing. If I am alone in my car you would find me with the radio turned up and me singing along.
33) I only listen to Christian radio. The songs speak to me. I find such joy in worshipping through music.
34) I secretly wish that I had an amazing voice. I would love to be able to belt out a song like some of those musicians do. I do sing in church on occasion but it terrifies me.
35) I don’t read my Bible like I should.
36) I am addicted to HGTV and the Food Network. My favorite shows are the Cake Challenge competitions and the “Designed to Sell” shows.
37) I sing silly songs to Elijah to make him laugh. I have one that I made up that was to help him hear and identify his own name. It goes like this: “Elijah, Elijah you’re my baby, you’re Elijah”. Gabriel and Isaac think it is funny and now they sing it too!
38) I also sing “You are my Sunshine” and “I am Waiting” to him. I LOVE that it makes him smile.
39) When I eat M&M’s or Skittles I group them together in a color pattern and then eat them. I sometimes make then into shapes first and then eat them in a specific pattern.
40) I am absolutely Type A.
41) I have a routine in the morning and I always do the same thing every day.
42) I have a short temper. My temper is DEFINITLY another one of my character defects. I often have to apologize for getting angry about something that wasn’t really “worth” getting angry about.
43) I love to take pictures and would like to someday take a class and learn how to take better pictures.
44) I think that being a photographer professionally would be so fulfilling. Maybe someday when we are independently wealthy! Ha ha
45) I went on a mission trip to Jamaica when I was a freshman in college. It was an amazing experience. I hope that someday I can do something like that again.
46) I don’t spend enough time telling/showing Dominic how much he means to me. He is my best friend and I often take him for granted.
47) I love to blog. I used to journal but - yes you guessed it – I quit that. But something about an “online” journal has been easier for me to keep up with.
48) I have different ideas every day about things I would like to blog about but in reality I probably blog about 1 out of every 10 ideas.
49) I know that with God’s help I can do all things but I am often scared about what I can handle. I put the emphasis on me and often forget about the “He” in those situations.
50) It is my heart’s desire to be an example of Christ in everything that I do. I usually fail miserably but I am not willing to give up on the thought!

A full day

What were you doing at 7am this Saturday morning? Gabriel and I were indulging our blue cravings by making blue cupcakes with blue frosting and blue sprinkles!!

Ever since my friend Amanda introduced me to the wonderful world of food coloring I have been going nuts! So this morning we decided to make some special treats in Gabriel's favorite color! He even went as far as to tell me that we had to pretend it was his birthday again and made me call him "Birthday Boy"!

Later this morning we took a short trip across the "border" into Iowa where we went to order a passport for Isaac. He will be going with his grandpa on a mission trip to Hayti in late December and we needed to get that ordered so it will be here in time. I am really excited about this trip and hope that it is an eye opening and heart changing trip. We have so many things to be grateful for here that we take for granted and I am hoping that helping others and being of service might really have an impact on him.

After that Dominic and I spent a couple of hours in our yard bagging up what turned out to be a very large amount of leaves. 7 - 55 gallon bags full! It was a big job but it was a beautiful day to be outside doing yard work.

Once that job was complete, I cleaned myself up and went to meet my mom to go to a Holiday Open House where a woman from our church was selling her homemade craft goods. We both found a couple of things and it put me in a pre-holiday spirit!

While I was gone Dominic worked on putting Christmas lights up on our deck and for the 1st time in several years won't have to be out in freezing cold temps to get our house decorated! YEAH!

Now after we have all been fed, we are going to watch a movie together called 'Aliens in the Attic". I hope that your day has been full too. Full of love, laughter and lots of time with your family! Blessings dear friends!

This and That...

I wanted to share a couple of photos that I took yesterday. Let's face it -Elijah is SO BIG. And by big I mean he is one fat baby!! :) He barely fits in his Bumbo chair because his thighs are so fat. He is working on his third chin as we speak and is sporting what we lovingly refer to as his "Trump" do. The hair on both sides of his head have all but worn off but he has this bunch of long hair in the top middle of his head that is growing longer with each day. He looks a little dazed in this photo but I think he was trying to figure out why his mom and dad were laughing so hard when we were taking his pictures. Thankfully though he is the only healthy boy in our household so maybe all that "fat" is working to his advantage!

Confession: I am addicted to sweets. Seriously this is no laughing matter. You will often find me with several rolls of Smarties in my pocket. You know those little rolls of candy that we ate when we were young?? I can't seem to get enough of the sweet stuff. Yesterday when I stayed home with the boys I had a craving for something sweet and for baking so I made this "Afternoon Delight Peanut Butter Pie". It is SOOOO good. If you have ever had the peanut butter pie from Perkins you will LOVE this pie. And it is so easy to make. I felt like I was doing some "Semi-Homemade Cooking" like Sandra Lee from the Food Network yesterday.



In an effort to also feed the family (since sharing my pie was most certainly out of the question) I decided to try something that I had never made before. (Amanda I am going to try that chicken casserole soon - yum!) I had heard of someone else trying this spaghetti casserole and found a recipe online and decided to try it. Overall it was pretty good. It turns out a lot like a lasagna and the recipe says it makes enough for 8 - I think this pan could have served many more than that!

The only thing I would change with the recipe is to use a few less noodles. Once it baked up it wasn't quite as "saucy" as I would have liked. But overall it was fun to try something new that everyone in my family could enjoy!

Have a great rest of the week!!