Let there be white....

Trim!!

I don't know about you...but this I think is a thing of beauty...as far as barns go I mean!

The white really made the whole thing pop.

We talked about it early this morning and decided that we would just go for it and get the job finished...

And we are so glad that we did....looks even better than it did yesterday!

Although I don't know that the former owner of this web feels the same! :)

What a difference a day makes....

We spent the day out in Parker so that we could help Dominic's parents paint their garage, summer kitchen and barn.

These are some of the "befores"

And here are some of the "afters"

It was a HUGE job and we worked all day long - but it looks great. Eventually white trim will be added to the barn but it wasn't going to happen today.

How did you spend your Saturday??

What Women Fear - Winners!!

Congratulations to the winners of the book "What Women Fear" by Angie Smith!! 



I know that you will be blessed by this book and I wish I had a copy to send to everyone. And thank you for sharing some of your fears here. I will be praying for all of you and asking that God reveal Himself in all things to each of you!!

I used a number generator from Random.org and tried to embed the widgets into this post but I am having techinical difficulties this morning..so I apologize for that.

But it picked for me and the winners are:

Congrats to Sarah S. From "All Other Ground is Sinking Sand - Our Life After Loss"

And congrats to Jaimie from Displacedcitygirl!!

Please e-mail me your addresses at kasmith03@gmail.com and I will get your copies out to you!! Yay for Fridays and fun giveaways!!

God Knows What We Need

Sometimes God knows just what we need....even when we don't know if or when we will need it ourselves.

Let me give you an example.

This, as most of you know, is Elijah....

He likes cake...or "BIG cutcake" as he says it!

He loves to pose for pictures and look cute and he has a million different expressions that just melt your heart.

He also loves being 2 and with that comes tantrums and pushing boundaries and blowing bubbles in your milk - even when mom tells him to stop!

Some days having a 2 yr old is a lot to handle. :)

When we first looked into moving here my first thought was to find someone to watch our kids because I had to continue to work. I made some calls and it was looking pretty grim and then I asked someone from the local branch bank here if they had any ideas and I was given a name.

With my past experience it didn't seem like an opening was possible - especially when it was an in-home daycare, but I called anyways and you know what? There was an opening....she was losing a family that had a 2 yr old and a baby.

hmmmm....coincidence? I don't think so!!

So one weekend when we were up in Marshall looking for houses we stopped and met Markel and her family. And from the moment we met them we just knew it was "right". Her son Isac sat with us and talked about his faith in God and all of the great opportunities there were for kids in town. Her daughter Dara was home from college and treated us like we were old friends. And I think Markel had Karlena asleep within minutes of us showing up as she held her.

And I know...who couldn't love this girl right? But even for babies, transition can be hard. But Karlena hasn't even batted an eye. She is all smiles when I drop her off and when I pick her up. She has transitioned so well.

Elijah though has his 2-yr old moments. He told me yesterday that "I have fun at Markel's and I go in time out!"  He was so proud of himself! He can be such a handful.

I had e-mailed Markel about something earlier today and in it told her that I hoped Elijah had been behaving because I know how he can get.....

And her response??

"I love him...He is so sweet, and a true boy...reminds me of my Isac at that age... :)  always good with E :)"

You see? God knows.

He knew EXACTLY who we needed to love and care for our children during the day when we couldn't do it ourselves. He provided an opening just when the time was right and He gave our whole family a blessing in Markel.

Thank you God for seeing our needs so far in advance of us knowing it ourselves. You have provided so much for us here and we are eternally grateful. Thank you for Markel - may You bless her today and always!

Back to School Shopping - Shoes

Thank you to Crocs for sponsoring this blog post. Please click here to learn more about Crocs’ new Back to School line. I was selected for this sponsorship by the Clever Girls Collective. All opinions expressed here are my own.

Now that the kiddos are back in school and I have a little time to breathe :) I wanted to share one of my Back to School shopping experiences.

You would think that shopping for boys would be pretty easy -and for the most part it is. Except that is when it comes to shoes.

After searching several stores and an online purchase returned, I took Isaac out and said I didn't care the cost - just find something, anything that fits you and is comfortable. I didn't think finding school shoes would be this difficult!! He did finally find something when out with his grandpa (thanks dad!!), but if you asked him he would rather be wearing his Crocs.

He has the slip on kind...you know like this....

And although the straps have broken and they are pretty worn out - they have always been his "go to" shoe. But they aren't really appropriate "school" shoes.

Now Gabriel only has 1 criteria for shoes...NO TIES. He can tie his shoes, but they always come untied and "retying is such a chore mom"! :)  I have decided that, at least for now, fighting over a tie shoe isn't worth it and shoes without ties are fine with me.

Wouldn't these new Crocs be perfect for him??

An added bonus is that they are waterproof, like all of the other Crocs, so when he is splashing around in puddles (as he is apt to do) I won't have to find a vent to dry them on overnight!! BONUS!

The Crocs Back to School kids' line are school-approved on the outside (because they're close-toed and close-heeled), but have the same comfort in the inside 13 new styles for boys and girls from K-8.  Just by checking out their site - you can enter a giveaway for a family vacation to San Diego with no purchase necessary!! I am all in for that and already entered - Mark and Mindi here I come!! 

And if you want to learn more about the new Crocs line check out the video below.
(It's a little cheezy if you ask me...but the kids liked it) :)

The music video is interactive- you can click on the shoes in the video to go directly to the shoes' corresponding pages on the Crocs official site.

Added Bonus!!!: Try to find the hidden Easter Egg within the video, click on it and see what happens! And here's a hint for you...look for the object below and click on it for a special "secret discount"!!

Think yellow bird!! :)

It works, I tried it and I think I am going to have to use that discount towards a pair of these shoes!! So tell me what was your best and worst back to school shopping experience this year??

"What Women Fear" - a Giveaway!!!

I am so excited to share this book with you today and I have a great little giveaway too so keep reading!!  I got my copy of "What Women Fear - Walking in Faith that Transforms" by Angie Smith last Friday.
It.Is.Amazing!!

I finished it yesterday and I can't wait to find some time to go through it again and really devour it even more. I tend to read really fast and I don't want to miss any of Angie's nuggets of truth so this time I will have a pencil in hand so that I can mark my favorite parts.

In this book Angie shares about not only her personal fears, but of the fears of some familiar and maybe not so familiar people of the Bible.  I found in each chapter something that I could relate to and was moved by the honesty in which Angie shares her life.

Here is just one of my favorite parts....

"Another fear that many of us have is that we will let people down and not meet their expectation of us.  I think that so many of us feel like the real "us" will be exposed when we don't rise up to what someone else thinks we should be. So many of us feel burdened by our perceptions of the expectations of others. We often live our lives trying to avoid letting people down."....

"As a result, many of us talk about the weather at a Bible study instead of the fight we had with our teenage daughter, knowing that we might be labeled the overprotective parent, or the one that can't control her own children. And long after the issue is resolved, we will still be seen as the one who messed up. The labels we create (and dwell on) for each other are killing our chance for genuine community and we are missing the best part of each other."

Does any of this resonate with you like it does me? And the book is filled with points that not only helped to convict my stubborn heart but also offer hope for freedom....true freedom in following and trusting in the One true Redeemer.

I promise that it will be worth your time to read this book!!

And now is your chance to win one as well!! I have 2 copies available to share with 2 of my readers!! These are books that I purchased myself and I have not been compensated in any way to endorse Angie's book. I just believe in her and this book and want to share the love!!

The winners will be chosen randomly on Friday September 9th.

So here's how you enter with 3 separate chances to win: :)

(Leave 1 comment for each "Chance" and please make sure to leave your e-mail address in the comment if you don't have an active blog so that I can contact the winner!!)

1) Become a follower of my blog - The Smith Family Journey (Or comment if you already are!)

2) Share in a separate comment one of your fears...this can be anything you struggle with!

3) Share for another chance the title of a book you have read and enjoyed recently.

And if you want a copy of "What Women Fear" for yourself right now click on the Amazon link on the left sidebar and you can purchase a copy today!!  Have fun and good luck!!

"Maint Reqd"

So in the van I drive each day there is this "Maint Reqd" light that comes on every time you start it up. When the van is running as it should the light comes on briefly and then shuts off.

When you are nearing the time for an oil change the light will stay on and flash as you are in reverse and then shut off when you put it into drive.  Like a warning/reminder that you need to take some action soon.

And even after the vehicle has been checked and you think everything is ok, if the code isn't reset the light will stay on all the time. A sign that something is still not right on the inside.

And so it has been in my life recently as well....

When Dominic first moved to Tyler for this new job we didn't know how long we would have to live apart but we said we could do anything for 6-12 months. During that time, overall, things were pretty good. We cherished our phone conversations that we had every night and enjoyed our weekends as a family. We did that for 8 months. During that time we had a baby, put our house on the market, sold it, purchased a new one in Marshall and moved. In addition, during that same time I was made promises by my then boss that I could continue to work from the home when we finally moved. 2 weeks before the move my bosses employment with my company was no longer and it was learned by me that all of his promises had not been communicated to the "powers that be".

So in the midst of one of the biggest life changes for our entire family I was also fighting to save/keep the job I had with a company I have been with for almost 13 years. I have been given a "trial period" to see how/if it can continue and I say prayers everyday that it will....soon time will tell with that.

Well as you can imagine during this time the "Maint Reqd" light in my own life started showing up.

At first it was just that reminder that something needed to be taken care of in my heart. It was the Holy Spirit prodding me...trying to get my attention that if left alone/ignored a full-blown warning would ensue.

But I am a stubborn woman and one that wants to not only have the appearance that I have it all together...but actually HAVE it all together by my own doing - so I can take the credit right?. And when I don't have it all together- which if you must know is most days - I get frustrated, angry, discontented and negative.  All lovely qualities and surprisingly enough...none are found in the Bible under fruits of the spirit. hmmm....

So as you can about imagine when I stopped showing evidence of love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, gentleness, goodness, faithfulness and self-control in my life - the dynamics of our family began to change and cracks started to form in our foundation.  And once a crack has started and the water starts to rise....if the foundation isn't solid it can start to crumble.

Friends I have found myself here. The "Maint Reqd" light is on and shining brightly ALL the time. Warning....warning... It isn't a pretty place to be when your actions cause hurt and frustration. When it is evident that negativity has permeated every aspect of your thinking once again and it hasn't just hurt you but it has hurt the people closest to you that you love the most.

For weeks I have focused on everything that I see is "wrong" about my husband. Refusing to allow myself to see the truth because believing the lie helps justify my awful behavior and admitting that I am to blame for anything is so very difficult for me.  I started thinking that this move was a mistake - we loved better when we were apart....when the truth is that I hadn't put much effort into loving well here....I just expected that once we were back together that we would be one big happy family and everything would come easy.

But it isn't always easy.

I worry about what will happen with my job on a daily basis and always feel that I need to "prove" myself more than I ever did before. And if I fail...if I lose the job what does that say about me? Because how I look to you from the outside seems more important lately than how my insides look to God.

I obsess over the kids and their transition here. Mornings are chaos it seems. I get up almost 2 1/2 hrs before we need to leave the house at 7:35am and yet it is always a rush. And I get overwhelmed and stressed and don't know how to appropriately deal with it so I end up barking at someone - causing more hurt. My motives may be good...getting everyone, including myself off to school/daycare/work by 8am. But the way I act as I try to carry out my objective isn't right.

Please tell me I am not alone in this struggle!!

But at times such as this I need to be honest about these struggles....and what I haven't been willing to do about them.

I haven't been actively seeking God's Word. Sure I pray and I go to church...but I don't make time to read His Word. I have plenty of time for blogging and Facebook and checking e-mails, but not enough time for Him.

And I don't seek accountability like I should from other believers. I would rather you see the facade then the real me because I am not sure many people would stick around if they knew how crazy my minds gets at times!

But this has to change! "Maint Reqd" in the vehicle handbook says "Take your vehicle to an appropriate Toyota mechanic immediately".

And I too need to respond immediately - but I need your help!! First I would love some recommendations for a devotional maybe that I could do each day. I have a hard time just opening the Bible and reading. Maybe a devotional would give me some direction..something where I can be led to read more in the Bible based on that day's devotion. What works for you??

And secondly I need your help in staying accountable. This is the part I really don't want to do...but I know that if I want things to change I HAVE to do it.

So if you see me ask me how I am treating my husband and my kids. Am I showing him respect, and I being patient with my kids or am I letting "life" overwhelm me again? If you ask me how I am doing I will always say "I'm fine". Guaranty it!! Email me and share your experience in these areas...what has worked for you (besides hiring a FT nanny/housekeeper) because that isn't in the budget!! :)

I would love to make this a place where we can fellowship together and be real. No pretty clothes, or makeup...no plastered smiles...but real, honest accountability. I promise you that even if I do all of these things I won't ever have it all together and somehow I need to come to a place where that is OK.

I know this post has gotten overly long and I apologize....thank you for allowing me to share my struggles with you. It is ugly....but I believe in the promises that God makes beauty from ashes. But I have to be willing to do a little "work" too...so that my friends is where I start!