Tuesday, February 14, 2012

A Covenant Kind of Love

When I married Dominic waaaaay back in 1996 I had many dreams for what our life would be.  I knew that we would have a house and a family, good jobs and maybe a dog.  We would work hard and see the benefits of that hard work.

Life would be easy and fun and full of love.

Isn't that what every bride and groom think? That love will get them through anything? And troubles??? What troubles - surely we wouldn't have any of those!

And then reality hits, life happens..it gets hard and sometimes it isn't easy to love.

So what then?

I think too many people - me included initially - thought that love was all we needed. But then when things did get tough and the lovey-dovey feelings weren't flowing very much....didn't know what to do next.

Over the years Dominic has reminded me about the covenant commitment we made to each other when we said our vows.  It wasn't that we would love each other as long as it "felt" good. No, it was that we committed ourselves to each other in good times and bad, in sickness and in health for better and for worse, till death parts us.

We made that covenant with God in front of our family and our friends. And that means that we must love and encourage one another, be respectful and kind in ALL things.  

Regardless of how we are "feeling".

I have been a bit of an emotional wreck lately. I feel overwhelmed and depressed and scared about the changes that our family might be facing. Since I can't see the future (although I wish like heck I could!!) I can only guess...but I am just plain scared about the future and what it holds for us.

I typically am very positive about God's plan and trusting Him in the good and bad times. But the past several days have been bad and I have been negative and isolating.

This is one of those times where I am making it just a little VERY hard for Dominic to "love" me.  If it were all about the feelings we would probably be in a tough place.

But Dominic loves me with a covenant kind of love. The kind of love that says I am going to give 110% right now even if you can't, I am going to support you and love you and encourage you...even if it isn't returned.

Dominic has modeled such love and grace to me and I am such a lucky woman.  Although we don't exchange big, fancy, expensive gifts on Valentine's Day - I wouldn't want things any other way.

My heart is full because God placed a wonderful man in my life and I am so grateful that on a day when we celebrate love that I am gifted with so much more than that.

"Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres."

-1 Corinthians 13:4-7


Sarah said...

So true! I wish everyone understood marriage to be this way!

Sal B said...

I am praying for you! Whatever it is you're going through, God has you in the palm of His hand. I know you know this Kristin. Thanking Him for Dominic, and what he means in your life. God is so amazing in putting spouses together, isn't He? I feel the same way about my husband. Blessings <3

Valerie said...

My hubby & I always remember way back t 1992 when we attended marriage prep classes at our church. An older, more "experienced" couple mentioned that sometimes love is 40/60, sometimes it's 80/20. It's not always 50/50. That has always, always stayed with us. Marriage is tough. Add kids, jobs, mortgages, car payments, in-laws. It's not all love poems and roses and sometimes is a lot of work! I do wish people today took their vows and commitments more seriously (i.e., Kim Kardashian).

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